The courtyard behind the old church that is now a 'cultural center' was walled, so that only the unknown inhabitants of a second story apartment on the other side of the alley had any view if it. The spigot and the dangling hose were now in the shade of the church wall, a different world completely than that of the sun-scorched concrete a few feet away. The venetian blinds in the apartment looked convincingly from this distance like they were closed against the same sun….
I went for it. Grabbing a towel that I keep in my car, I doffed my sandals and whitish linen shorts…the only clothes I'd been wearing… and turned on the spigot, keeping my bare posterior facing that apartment window, just in case. God, what a heavenly thing it is to step under a running hose of cool water after hours of 105 degree sweating…. yes? And the feel of the breeze hitting the skin as I toweled… that is freshness.
Could this be 'the high point' of my day? What a crazy, foolish question! Who should care! Life cannot be lived constantly looking backwards. Life is lived non-comparatively…. and, one good moment like this at a time. All I knew was it was a glorious moment. Then…happy for the break...
I went back inside the building….into the un-air-conditioned oven of the meeting hall…where the free gift of the old grand piano that I was repairing to make useable awaited it's resurrection at my hands for its future audiences.
A long long time ago in the mid-1980's I received a phone call at my Santa Fe home inviting me to a meeting about a female saint from India. The meeting was to be an slide show introduction to the saint and a Q & A about whether to invite her to New Mexico. She was coming to the USA for the first time in a few months, and the American woman/girl/devotee I was speaking with (who had been living with her in India for some time) had been sent back to the States to organize the visit.
I went to the meeting, as did about a dozen other people, and watched a video of a white robed young woman hugging and blessing crowds of people in India. And I and others said yes, let us invite her to New Mexico. And so Ammachi came to New Mexico, that first year to a living room-sized crowd, but that grew quickly into a big top, and then that---as the crowds continually increased--gave way to the using the largest hotels…
Except for the crowds growing, Ammachi has pretty much stayed with the same general tour pattern… first Seattle, then San Francisco, then LA, then NM, then Dallas & eastward etc… (If you can visit Amma anywhere, yes, do it! More info at Amma.org)
Tuesday (for the first time there) I will go see her in LA. As it has been several years since our last such rendezvous, it will be a precious moment for my heart.
Oh… and the point of the story?… No beginning is too small for the truth to use. All that is required is the sincere invitation.
June 17 is my 'leave Yuma' (for the summer) day. For several weeks I have been busy crossing off the items on my 'must do before leaving' list. Install automatic outdoor plant watering system. Done. Finish building new cargo tow trailer. Done (except the tail-light bug..). Repair piano at St. Paul's. In progress. Repair Mom's roof. Up next…. The universe is helping out with miracles here and there, as it sees I am serious. And I know I am too, because I've been spending the money to get everything shipshape. (That's all I will say about that.) Therefore this one's sadhana… and adventure…(same/same) will then continue for about two weeks in northern New Mexico, where I AM going to be attending the 3HO Summer Solstice gathering (as a member of the audio sound crew [Big Yes!]). This is a return to and deeper-exploration of the Kundalini yoga connections and practices that I wrote about experiencing in April at Sat Nam Fest, with the added benefit that it takes me home to New Mexico for the first time since last November. I have no assignment that I know of other than to make sure I do not escaped untouched. I am very curious….
I suspect several other northwestward semi-long-distance journeys will follow sequentially, as that is the vision--- 64 year-old happy rawfooder and 'Love-Declaration/music/art-sharing-lightworker with tiny just built unique tow-trailer of art (and art & music-making supplies) hits road in ultra-economical very low carbon footprint little ol' Geo Metro' for summer-long walkabout under God's guidance… (this is in contrast to 'hits road in lumbering big expensive to operate diesel cargo truck---as was the case last summer…).
I suspect it just seems like times change. But really, if we/I stay in the moment, it is just forever unfolding now now now now now.
If you don't mind, I'll save the rest of my subject lines for another edition. Like I said, 'brief windows' is the order for today. Other active irons-in-the-fire…they need maturity time still.
Hope this was a nice little read for you. Thanks for coming by. You-all come back soon again, hear?
Namaste, Sat Nam,
David
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In my view of it, everything occurring in our non-accidental lives is a sadhana opportunity. Therefore everything, even the summer desert heat, somehow conspires to support our growth--- yes? Take the fact that my internal laptop fan runs so much cooler at 3 am (when it's about 80 degrees instead of near 110)… so, that which gently guides me encourages me to awaken then…. to use the predawn lower temperature window to write these essays….that would be 'sadha-supporting indigenous spiritual intelligence', yes?
Years ago (during my youthful summers working for the US Forest Service as a mountain-top wilderness fire lookout) my inner guides began to teach me to look for this flow… this heightened awareness of the synchronistic dovetailing of reality with the needs of the moment. I learned simple lessons then… like that my twice-weekly water-trek a mile down the mountain to my spring was best done during my noon-hour lunch break-- because I would be so drenched with sweat from the hustling climb to get back up 'on time' carrying that 50 pounds of water that the next obvious thing to do was to take a sponge bath, followed by natural air drying--via a beautiful alpine altitude nude solar sun bath. In this scenario, the mid-day timing was the point, as if I went before or after work I would miss the warmth of the day. Timing. Very important.
I call this 'living naturally', or 'organically attuned'. And I see it as the sanest way for me to live--- to yield to life's flow as directed by nature's timing-- instead of (mis)using all of the technologies man has created in unwise efforts to dominate and/or control nature. The Sufi master Hazrat Inayat Khan went so far as to state that nature is the true Holy Book… ie, that in her pages one can learn all needful lessons for living. In any case, I find much wisdom here….
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I impulsively bought a beautiful looking 18" tall potted papaya plant this week (from the Home Depot garden department). The tag picture looked like the Mexican variety, which I eat often but so far have been unsuccessful at getting going from the fruit's seed. Something intuitive had me check that out… first online to do a latin name search (which revealed that the variety was Hawaiian--known to now be 90% GMO), and then following that up with a call the nursery over in the LA area that supplied the plant to Home Depot. My questions first were answered by the receptionist, who assured me that the plant was non-GMO, but as I had some questions she couldn't answer (about how to best grow the plant) she promised to have another person who did know call me back. When that conversation happened, the man used some legal phrases like "to the best of my knowledge", which were red flags. Questioning deeper, he revealed that what they actually did was 'buy the fruit and use the seeds inside'. I sat with that-- and concluded from that information that there was a 90% chance that the plant actually was GMO, and returned the plant for a refund.
The lesson? Sometimes it's a lot of work to be responsible for my impulses.
I was driving to our local commercial zone to pick up something and passed a professionally dressed young man (early twenties) walking along the road in the hot afternoon sun without a hat, carrying a briefcase. I remembered my own door-to-door sales struggles at that age, and empathized. Boy did he look hot. Then I received an inner message to turn around and offer him some water, just to make sure he wasn't getting too dehydrated. At first I didn't want to, but in the next few micro-seconds of thinking, I realized I would much rather simply do that than to suppress my concern for the man under a denial of ego justifications that 'it wasn't my business'. Of course it was my business. My heart was clear on that. So I turned around, when back, and asked if he needed water. He was clearly surprised that some stranger was concerned for him, and assured me that he was OK, that he only lived a couple blocks away. I said "Fine…I just needed to know…it's so hot". He smiled, disappearing our generational difference, as he waved goodbye. I'm glad I stopped to check. I felt human… to be able and willing to take the time. As distinct from 'mechanical/machine-like', which is what I have felt like in the past when in similar circumstances I haven't.
A few months ago new unattractive neighbors arrived into the usually quiet empty lot right next to me in an aging 5th wheel trailer. It was quickly obvious that they were dysfunctional and both drunks (and loud). My ego wasn't pleased at all, but I could see this was karma (the guy recognized me…I'd given him a ride when he was hitchhiking locally a year before, AND I'd given him a copy of 'The Love Declaration' too), so after setting my boundaries (speaking straight with them about who I was, what I did, and what I needed in terms of privacy) I didn't resist (as much as possible) and used all our interactions as practice in being present without judgement (as much as possible). After several months of overhearing their battles, she finally kicked him out. Things got quieter again. Then I noticed she was going to church on Sundays. She said yes, and that she was now sober two months. I congratulated and impersonally encouraged her, and even once fixed her broken lock for her (but I let her know in the future what I would charge if she needed my services). Anyway, the thing I noticed this week after a brief interaction over the fence was that my attitude towards her was 'slightly positive', that I had enjoyed talking to her. I looked at that and realized she was a teaching for me that given time people can change and grow. Then I realized that 'people' could include me. Hummmm….
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Mom was sitting in her chair talking to me about something when suddenly her face contorted with emotions and she chokingly blurted out that 'she was so grateful that lately it seemed like I cared about her'. Of course I've thought that the two years I've stayed here with her were obviously about me caring about her. I'm sure that's true, but from her world, I can see it didn't count, comparatively. What counts is that I have been more willing to listen to her. I used to let her dog do that, but the dog died a few months ago, and Mom doesn't want another. The gifts in that are many (logistically), but it has produced this subtle over time shift between us. And other things and experiences I've been having have dovetailed in their support of this. They have all been removing the history of this 'mom' person, and revealing just another myself. More, I am sure, to come on this. In due time. :-)
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I am getting ready to travel north again this summer… this time much lighter than in a long time. My newish-to-me 1992 Geo with it's 45 mpg hallelujah appears solid, but it's quite cramped. Therefore, to carry some art and other supplies, I've just constructed a unique little tow trailer, which I hope to debut here real soon (still have to get the lights/turn signals working etc). The plan is… well, the plan is to… keep reporting.
Well, actually, the only real plan is that same one I share with each of you. I downloaded that a couple days ago… that what we are all doing in our own ways is practicing become/being perfect… meaning (the way I organize it) being an in the flesh embodiment of the 'Christ Consciousness'. It's just what a good yogi does, right? First, train the geni (the mind) with the heart's wisdom's, and then, let him/her out of the bottle (to bless the world).
Hope to see you out on the playing fields. Although there is a lot of work to be done, there is joy awaiting in it's doing.
8 PM Saturday evening…The 20 inch fan sits upon it's mounting pole 7 feet behind me, speed set on medium, blowing the 90-ish degree summer evening air upon my bare back. It feels cooling against my sweat… not like an air-conditioner's unnaturally frigid kind of cold… more like the gift of a breeze when working in summer fields. I sit on my Zen-like slanted bench, knees folded, legs under me, watching my fingers type and my computer screen responding, aware of my breathing, and recognizing that for some reason the moment is poetic….
Today, because in my pondering I came to see that 'not to' was to be led by the voice of a inner cowardice that I AM no longer willing to give my life to, I actually physically marched (for the first time I can clearly remember since the Viet Nam War) 'against' something…something facelessly named Monsanto. In case you do not know, there were mass media-ignored protest marches against the GMO biotech corporation around the world today in more than 300 cities, Yuma being just one of them. I put the 'against' in hyphens because I am not 'against' things as a norm… but I AM very much FOR a great many principles that the corporate giant is clearly not operating from (with unfortunately, devastating results upon many peoples and life forms planet-wide)… and that being the case, I chose today to stand up and say by my participation in Yuma's diminutive forty-person march that Monsanto (just like each of us individually) must be accountable for the results of it's choices. Actually, I didn't say that accurately. Because really, it is and will be you and I that must also be willing to be responsible and accountable. Even in 'the best case scenario', Monsanto's impact could never be corrected (cleaned up) by Monsanto alone (the chemical/genetic havoc they have unleashed is too widespread and pervasive)… therefore, I am clear that after their agenda is defeated and they are reintroduced to the human equalness that begets sanity again, that because 'there is really only one of us here', it is we that have the opportunity/responsibility…and shall inherit… the work of healing this world.
At one point during the short march I found myself on camera talking to a local TV station's microphone. As I have no TV service I will not see whatever the result of that conversation is edited into... if it is aired. And even though the reporter's face was a strange mix of boredom and 'who are these crazies'…I pray and affirm that only good will come of it. To me, the interesting part was that I was so clear I had something to say to that camera and to the people beyond it. I felt 'the messenger' in me raise up and be, if not eloquent, at the least, the speaker of a committed view.
In the long run, that may be the big spiritual payoff for my participation…because (for me) to discover that committed view has been the work of this lifetime, in a way. I think that that is the Way for many of us… that at first (as children) we do not know much of anything… we are clueless and easily taken advantage of… but IF via the long path of accumulating experience year after year we do begin to 'awaken' it is really only to ourself… our true unlimited self ….that Self that is unified with all. Then begins to arise that committedness of heart that can answer that old question…"WHY am I here?". Our heart answers with the commitment that it IS.
For me, I know the commitment living inside me is to Being Love for all Beings…(the kind of love that the 'The Love Declaration' languages for me)(www.thelovedeclaration.org). It took some quieting…some sorting out…to realize that protesting against Monsanto today was the best way for me in this moment to be that LOVE… both for them (as a community of misguided humans behind the faceless corporate mask) and also for all those that are currently paying the price of Monsanto's apparently total and fundamentally insane drive for control of the worlds food supply by any means possible.
Because such insanity taken to its extreme (which Monsanto has a long history of demonstrating…that it is committed to continue doing… in its quest for political power and economic monopolistic food control) leads to an increasingly hellish and unconscious life for humanity as a whole, it is inevitable and an expression of every beings right of self-defense to stand for our true and natural freedom. This, like all the other crises of our times, is again a test of our collective human will to be free… something that can only be attained by those willing to be also fully responsible for the hidden fact of our fundamental Unity with all life. And of course, the path to that requires that the first thing we must be willing to be responsible for is the darkness within ourselves. Therefore, may we each continue to place the intention of deepness upon the alter of our own purification. As A Course in Miracles teaches: Miracles are natural, but purification is necessary first.
Namaste, & Sat Nam,
David
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Back in Joshua Tree, CA this weekend at another lovely spiritual yoga event… Shakti Fest…the world of devotional yoga surrounds me, reopening all my memories of the era of my younger life when I was a first-time explorer of yoga's mysteries. Now listening to the rhythmic waves of Sanskrit mantras wafting across the ridges and valleys of this retreat center's desert landscape reminds me of the temples which fill the vedic landscape of southern India with similar melodies. Here, like the there of my memories, bhajans are everywhere.
I had earlier decided not to attend this festival based on the consideration that at this time of year it would be unbearably hot here…. but as the time of the gathering approached, little subtle invitations to reconsider began arriving in my life. After realizing this event was offering a stellar lineup of expert yoga teachers (as well as amazing music) I finally responded to these 'you show go' clues, and inquired about attending as a volunteer staff member,…. and was accepted. Gratefully, a weather miracle has occurred, as the temperatures have dropped 15 degrees… just for this weekend…
This being Saturday night and the event not being over I can only selectively report on my experience so far…
The most true soundbite that I think I can utter is that my yogic path is deepening. So far two teachers here have impacted me… one has introduced me to a newly created approach to freeing the lower spine and hips (which is where our shakti/kundalini energy arises from). It is called Yin Yoga. The modality views our limbs as levers which can be used to open and realign our core structure. I can't do justice to describing it, I can just let you know it exists. After the class, I asked the teacher where this approach came from. She told me it was the inspiration of a yoga teacher named Paul Grilley. I was a bit shocked, as I realized I have known the man for many years (as he is a local resident of Ashland, Oregon---where my son grew up and where I have therefore spent significant time too) but that I did not know this was who he was, in the world of yoga.
When peace is a priority and things like this happen, the mind-based identity can easily forget that there are no mistakes in the timing of things. We learn what we need to about each other in perfect timing… how can it be any other way? Yet, even though this is so, the perfection can be improved on, yes? All it takes is deeper attention to our own subtleties… our own sense of guidance. I knew he was a yoga teacher. I simply had not asked to know more….
The second yoga teacher I must mention taught another side of yoga. What got me to go to her particular workshop was that Jai Uttal was going to be there… providing music for her. She is his wife--- Nubia Teixeira, who I have just discovered is an amazingly deep yoga guide. The breath/pranayama and mudra journey that I experienced under her lead was so powerful that I have a knowing that she has just entered my life in a significant way. Her website iswww.bhaktinova.com. I won't try to say more.
On to the music report. Chanting is a thing in this world, and thus can be done with or without ego. From the rock-star like main stage, there has been both here. That 's only my view, which could be just the view of my ego. My ideal about acceptance is to have space for everyone, but I do have preferences. So far of all the performers here my favorite has been a woman call Wah! Others have been very moving (David Newman for instance), but she was inspiring for me. A lot of that was her incredibly humble persona which just sang so purely from her heart, to the Godness…. but the fact that she also played a bass guitar…and at the same time sang the lead melodies (something quite difficult to do) was equally impressive…..
A segway….
I have been thinking a lot about music since Sat Nam Fest. In fact, it's been displacing my painting discipline quiet a bit, as I have gotten that I still desire to share my personal love of creating music with the world. So something that I haven't mentioned (that happened at Sat Nam Fest) was I spontaneously pitched myself to one of that record company's owners (the producer of that event) telling him that I was a musician, and that I was interested in signing a recording and distribution contract with him. This was based on my sense that since all their musicians were kirtan-based (as is a lot of my music) that there was a potential match. He was impressed by my paintings, which created an artist to artist appreciation opening, and we agreed to explore the idea via email. Because of that, I have put in a lot of hours creating a demo recording project to demonstrate to the company (Spirit Voyage) that I was potential recording artist material. My effort so far has been to focus on my own version of the famous Alleluia Chorus. I have shared it with a good number of people and have gotten generally favorable critiques so far. One of the moments that happened today was a serious critique of that recording effort by a professional music producer who I first met as a Sat Nam Fest staff (he's also here at Shakti Fest, on staff). His generous praise was sincere, but because his critique on my overuse of reverb explained WHY and HOW too much reverb can hide musical information that it is important NOT to high, his conversation was a breakthrough for me (as I'd never seen it that way before).
So my report is I have been learning on a number of levels this weekend. Returning to beginners mind… it is always a good practice.
That has been my delightful experience so far here. I pray my report contains something useful for you. Time for me to get some sleep, as my next shift is early in the morning….
