Opening 'The Messiah's Handbook' before beginning to write this weeks Journal, it gave me these messages:
"No matter how qualified or deserving you are, you will never reach a better life until you can imagine it for yourself, and allow yourself to have it."
And, on the opposing page, a second message I was drawn to read:
"There are grand rewards for those that pick the hard high roads, but those rewards are hidden by years. Every choice is made in the uncaring blind, no guarantees from the world around you."
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So on that note, let us continue our evolving conversation…our truth-telling about our growing...
I am so grateful for my life. The truth is I receive exactly what I need (you, I am sure, do to). This week the universe gave me a seriously great gift…in the form of a profound question…to be used as a guidance tool. That question is: "What does a man (or woman) who takes himself (herself) seriously do? What guides their actions? Their choices? Their vision of what is possible?
Don't you feel like you are guided? That's certainly my sense of things. And to suddenly be aware of this beautiful question arising in me… well, I recognized it is there because I know I am being led to my highest good, even though obviously sometimes resistantly. When it first arose, I was a bit stunned, because I saw that of course the context of the question was that I had NOT been taking myself seriously enough…perhaps for a good while. I didn't like seeing that, but (so what?) I did get it was true, at least from the view of (for instance) 'an art collector'. I say that because that's the context that the question first arose in…you know… was the way I was doing things as an artist going to result in a serious art collector taking me seriously as an artist to be collected? (Then, the question started morphing…expanding way beyond just 'art', to nearly everything---taking myself seriously as a writer, a yogi, a healer, a musician, etc…and as it did that, I began to recognize what an amazingly valuable question it was….). But (for now) just in terms of art, for some people I am clear the answer would be "NO"…that on the surface I don't meet many of the culturally-accepted societal standards for 'great artist' designation… yet. I mean to date, no major art magazines have ever written about me, no auction houses even know my name, no museum has any of my work in their collection. So from that point of view, I'm not currently a major force in the high society art world. That being so, the question necessarily arose… because if I take myself more seriously as an artist, what I do will of course reflect that seriousness…you'll see it in my art business actions. My honest look into the matter quickly showed me that although I am skilled at communicating the value of my art, I've been allowing some unnecessary fears to keep my gameplan a lot smaller than my visions. Time to change all that.. yes, yes. Time to allow myself to imagine it, create it, and have it.
But, not without some deep thought. Because I'm also clear that my happiness arises from being true to my Self, right? And I'm clear that my True Self is NOT concerned about the temporary phenomenal world or its societal judgements/assessments. Therefore, why play the success games of the 'false world'? The answer is: To Be Fully My Self ANYWHERE, and thereby contribute (inside 'time & space') a difference-making difference FOR GOOD with those who are still 'playing the world's games' (of status, money, power etc). In other words, for me what being an artist is really about is being an expression of my soul's freedom. In the world we are living in, that is needed. Why? Of course only to inspire 'other myselves' to their own expressions of freedom, that our world may have more joy and love flowing in it. That's how I see being an artist is exactly the same as being a minister.
Other lessons received this week…
I spent last weekend at a Hilton resort in Sedona, AZ… attending an event called the 'Raw Living Expo'. I was one of several hundred attendees, many from distant locations. The dream that I reported on last week (about being a conscious male) was received on last Friday night, then I had two days of practice while at the Expo. I graduated into some new insights and ways of being through that practice, and I've been continuing the practice. Basically, I finally got myself as a Grandfather. I'm not one literally, but at 64 I'm tenured enough to be one, even a Great Grandfather in some cases. To make that shift, I first had to get who were my sons & daughters, and then who were my grandchildren. There were a lot of illusions to let go of in doing this, as I have lived a long time like a Peter Pan, refusing to become a grownup. I've wanted to play with my sons and daughters and grandchildren like I was actually one of them. But, in recognizing the truth of the matter… that I am a Grandfather, albeit a very youthful one…there are many blessings too. I realized I could let go of a lot of the doingness in life… that that was now the younger generations job… they are the ones running the show for the most part these days… and I can now let them. It's OK. For the most part, they're doing a good job.
And, being a Grandfather has it's honorableness… it's respectable to be a worthy elder. I just need to do it 'correctly', meaning…with some dignity, right? I think I'll like getting the hang of it, now that I realize I am not a kid anymore. Whewww… finally…
Another gift: Returning home after the Expo I went to my yoga class to discover that we were to now learn 'laughter yoga'. I was resistant at first and it was difficult, but again God didn't care. She said 'So what?'--- keep on laughing. So I faked it until I got it. I mean, yes, I did get it… I need to laugh a lot more… particularly at myself. I found it interesting that I was getting two seemingly opposite lessons at the same time… 1. take yourself more seriously, 2. don't take yourself so seriously. But, if you look at them correctly, they are actually the same thing… the same coin, so to speak. Because just as personal significance is a trap, so is avoiding our greatness. Both waste our life. And our life… our time… this moment… that is all that is real. IT is the very real gift of our Originator, and what I am seeing this week is that it is my job to make each moment that I live be well lived… that that is the best way I can thank the Originator for such a gift.
So, to sum up (and keep this short…I know you like that…I've gotten that message)… it's been a particularly sweet week, with some good growth. I/We are like gardeners… only herein we are gardening ourselves. I think the Godness is probably as filled with joy at our growth as I have been this week at the blooming of my new little 3 foot Apricot tree that I planted a month ago. Funny how those little blossoms make me want to sing… my heart so full with happiness it just has to…
Till next week, may you all walk 'the narrow high road' excellently.
