Everyman's WEEKLY Journal #61
© 2014 Rev. David Seacord
February 2, 2014
The Great Light Arising…
Consciousness is about paying attention. This week my universal teachers have been stressing that. Case in point: Driving my little Geo on a nearby local road mid-week, suddenly the hood wildly flips up into the air and crashes back on my windshield, shattering it with hundreds of fractures. I immediately pulled off the road. I noticed I was pretty much just there, the only non-present stuff initially going on in my head being surprise and puzzlement as to how this had happened. I quickly dropped that and got present to now, evaluating the damage and choosing my next action. As the windshield was still intact and I could see through it enough to drive, but the hood had been distorted enough that it would not close, I unbolted the hood and tied it on top of my car and slowly drove home. (Wasn't I a lucky dude that I almost always carry some tools and some rope? Yep.) Along the way, I again began wondering how it had happened. Finally I remembered…. yes, I had intended to check the oil…I had pulled the hood release lever… then Ambrose had come out of the house to ask me a question and in responding to it I had gone to get him something… but by the time that was done I had forgotten that I had been about to check the oil. In a seemingly insignificant lapse of attention to a small detail, I forgot that I had pulled the hood release lever, and that without lifting the hood and dropping it into place again to reset the latch as locked, it would stay unlatched. And so I drove away unaware of my danger, and the consequences that would happen as soon as I reached a certain speed.
Now, was it all Ambrose's fault for coming out of the house and asking me a question? Please laugh with me… of course not. If there were to be a fault assigned, it would rightly be to my own lack of attention. I, being able to be about 92% adult about this, accepted it, and was responsible for all the necessary corrective actions… I called the auto glass shops, got quotes, made the appointment for the next morning, kept the appointment, watched the job be done with great interest, and paid the bill. I also further dismantled my mangled hood hinges, used my tools to bend them back into correct form, pounded my distorted hood back into useable form and reassembled it all. Voila, no longer pristinely perfect, but perhaps only noticeable on close inspection.
As I was doing all this, I was aware that I was being given the gift of a relevant lesson from the universe about being attentive and responsible, both which rest upon the foundation of self-honesty.
Earlier in the week another such lesson had also been given:
Ambrose came to me to share his feelings about some police brutality he had witnessed on YouTube… an incident that started because some guy had parked too far from the curb, but which developed into a reactionary mess with the guy being beaten by three cops, then a neighbor screaming at the cops to stop that, and 20 or more other cops showing up and chasing the neighbor back into his house, crashing down the door of his house and dragging both the neighbor AND the car guy off to jail. Ambrose was massively upset that he was living in a country where this could happen. I was pretty present to all this with him and heard the subtle request that I let my Voice for God come through mine. "Ambrose, did the video show the beginning of this incident? I mean, the first moments?" "No, Dad, it starts with the car guy being held down on the ground". "Ok", I said, "then we don't know how it started, do we?" "No, not really…" Ambrose replied. "Well, usually something happens at the beginning that creates the results…" I said, suddenly aware that by this conversation I was being led to see something that I myself had been resisting seeing about my camping ticket last summer. As the channelling continued, I heard myself speaking to Ambrose about not being naive, about understanding that we do not live in a free country but that we live in a money and political power controlled police state, that police are in the large part still sleepwalking human beings who are blind to themselves and without the tools of introspection, and that to move with grace and freedom and unhindered by them it is necessary to understand how to successfully deal with them.
Of course, as I was speaking all this to Ambrose, I was remembering how I had forgotten all of this last summer, and how angrily I had attacked that cop on the coast, demanding that he respect my right to sleep in my car. I told Ambrose…"You know, I was really lucky back last summer… in that he was the only cop for maybe 50 miles in either direction. If it had happened in a populated area, I might have had the same kind of experience that the guy in the video had…". My understanding was suddenly able to take a huge leap… I remembered that recently as I was studying Radiant Joy Brilliant Love I had been puzzled by references to the use of the word 'gremlin', and so I had gone to the back of the book to the glossary definition and read it. On my first reading pass through the definition, the word 'naive' had gone 'thunk' into my mind. And suddenly, right there talking to Ambrose, I got how massively naive I have been being in this legal dance I have been playing, … that I have been like a child playing with fire unaware of the consequences.
The moment I got the extent of my naivety, I suddenly felt incredibly freer. In understanding just how naive I have been being, I understood I could change that game, I could choose to stop being naive. As I saw the impact that could have in my life, I felt a deep gratitude for the lesson...
I immediately cancelled everything on my schedule so that I would have as much time as possible to prepare for court and to at least be able to make a decent presentation there (the court trial date is tomorrow, Feb. 3). I dived into my lawbooks and online research, and for two days I went to the law library. After only two days of this force-feeding (cramming, as distinct from incremental knowledge acquisition by disciplined study), I found myself barfing on all the undigestible law I was devouring. I hear my heart praying…"Oh God, I just want my life back. I just want to paint and make music…". Boom, said God, and cracked my windshield with his lightning bolts….
I lay in bed, looking at the 'beginning moments'. OK, yes, I had lost my presence. I had entered fear. I had reacted. I had taken it personally. Now that that was seen, what to do? How to make it all go away? Or did I wish it to? I really wasn't guilty of the charge. I really was only guilty of making the officer mad as hell. I recalled a Bible verse I'd learned as a child saying something like "before taking your brother to the judge, go to him and try to work it out". Inspired by the thought of clearing this citation up between ourselves, I called the Court and talked to the clerks. Yes (they said), once in a while an officer did voluntarily withdraw a citation, and in those cases, the case was automatically closed. Full of hope, I wrote an apology to the officer for not being conscious enough to avoid angering him. I told him I did not wish to challenge his integrity in court, I asked if he would withdraw the citation. I told him the reason he had found me there that morning was because the campground two miles away had been full (this was new information to him that I hoped would help him change his mind). I faxed it to him and his Captain and Lieutenant. The Lieutenant called me back, civilly and politely informing me that statewide CHP policies do not allow this. Not dissuaded, I called the CHP Sacramento HQ and spoke to appropriate staff, exploring if there could be an exception made to this policy. They explained the possible exceptions. I went back to the Lieutenant, making my case that I qualified for the exception. They (the local CHP) considered it but quickly decided they didn't see it that way. The trial was still set, I would have to convince the judge. I took the news of my failure 'like a man'.
From left field, the Universe squeezed me from another direction. Remember that I reported that I had made a trade with a local mechanic to repair my car just before I'd moved my Mom? I'd gotten the car back only a couple days before the move, driven it only locally a few miles, and because everything seemed good, towed it behind the UHaul when moving Mom in order to drive it and get back home. Well, coming home that 700 miles I used up 4 quarts of oil. And the car's exhaust smoke was not pretty. Since this all meant I either needed to rebuild the engine again or chuck the car, I took the news of this 'like a man' too. After checking compression (which was significantly lower than when last checked) I knew it was not the mechanics fault. He had only redone the engine head. This problem was clearly in the piston rings and was not related to what he had done.
That I needed to rebuild my engine was a serious problem however because, while I can do it, it will take time. I confronted the question "Can I still use the car "as is" to drive the 1400 mile round trip to go to Court?" The answer---after calling CHP again--- is NO. If my car is emitting pollution at a citable level (and it is), the fact that my plates are from New Mexico is not protection from such a citation in California. Have I had enough of CHP citations? Yes. OK, switching gears, can I use my Mother's car (which is still parked here) to make the trip? I called Mom and talked it over. She said OK, if that is what I needed to do. But then Ambrose pointed out the fact that we are still waiting for the new tags to arrive for that car's Oregon license plates, and that it is currently expired (since the end of December). So the price of using Mom's car to go to the trial is the risk of yet another ticket for driving on expired license plates. This might have been an acceptable risk in the past, but, since I am now not so naive, it is no longer.
Yes, I did consider the option of flying and a couple other transportation ideas too. They all resulted in me realizing that I was only willing to make the journey to court if the cost to me was reasonable. So, will I pay the fine just to make it go away forever? Or will I accept the inevitable default for non-appearance, but/and then stay in the game making motions for setting aside the default judgement by explaining my reasons for not being able to appear, and perhaps successfully creating a new trial date that I could appear at (and at the same time, visit my Mother too)? Actually at this Saturday night 7:54 pm moment I don't know. I am still sorting out my options to try and see if there are any valid 'karma or seva yoga' reasons to stay in this part of the game, such as all the views I put into the 'PS' of last weeks Journal…about why the law should be overturned or repealed.
I know I will be in touch with the court clerks on Monday morning to let them know I will not be appearing, and communicating the reasons why. I will ask questions then about my remaining options--'if I do this, what usually happens?', or 'if I do that, then what happens?' Does the fine increase? Is there a warrant issued? (Since it's only a county ordinance infraction, the answer to both is supposed to be NO, but… it's a detail worth double checking.) See, to me the whole point is to keep learning as much as I can…with the goal of getting comfortable and experienced being in the legal arena. What I mean is, to become very grounded in non-naivety, I've been watching all kinds of videos of police/citizen interactions, and consistently what I see is that the more you can demonstrate you actually know and understand the law yourself, the more respectfully you get treated by the police, especially if you keep your breath cool and don't get angry. My personal issue is that I have not really known the actual law that well at all, and thus I have always become afraid, and in that fear, lost my cool. But since, from the courts view, this situation now is basically about a couple hundred dollars of tribute money, and if or how I will pay it or escape paying it, I may choose to go a couple more rounds just so that I do not regret not having done so later. You get this? That the "on the court learning" going on here is still representing itself as an excellent mileage opportunity--- if I do not try to swallow too big a bite at one time, and if I don't take any of it personally, and if personal anger is not a part of the equation.
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You didn't think that that is ALL there is to share about, did you?
Today (Saturday) Ambrose and I went across the border into Mexico for the first time in Ambrose's adult memory. There is a Mexican-side border town next to Yuma called Algodones which is famous for it's cheap but mostly good dentists, inexpensive pharmacies, liquor stores, and optometrists… Each week (especially during winter snowbird times) thousands of Americans park in the huge American-side parking lot right next to the border and walk through the international separating wall into a couple of dozen blocks of offices, stores and markets. Ambrose has been needing some variety, so after a couple of hours of laughing with my good friends who consider my antics in public a hoot (we were at a local 'renaissance fair' with them then) we left the fair, and entered 'old Mexico'.
In the space of an hour the poverty we witnessed broke both our hearts. We were repeatedly asked to buy anything, everything, for almost any price… just please buy something! When Ambrose saw a poncho he really liked, the vendor first lowered the price twice, then added a second poncho for half the first. Ambrose has a huge heart, and gave the vendor significantly more that he had asked for. A small statured Indian woman with amazingly wise & soulful eyes approached me with trinkets I had no use for but I bought one anyway just to give her a dollar. Then, several times I just gave dollar bills to other Indian women. Ambrose and I were shocked at the desperation, the flat out begging for survival aid. Yes, I am familiar with our homeless with their signs (who are kept by our laws at a certain distance…), but in Mexico this distance was removed, and we were several times nearly surrounded, and articles were placed in our hands with clear resistance to taking them back. It was nakedly visible that these other human beings were desperate. It was also clearly visible that most of the people milling around us in this colorful Latin American world did not appear to care.
From a place of having stepped out of naivety, I saw what I was looking at and experiencing differently than I probably would have from within my previous naivety. I saw that although I am surviving within the United States on very modest means, I live in at least several hundred times more affluence than those north Mexican Indian women. They live only twenty-some miles away, yet until I crossed the borderline, they had been non-existent, except as a pastoral indigenous fantasy.
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Thus the question "What to do about the suffering in this world?" is becoming louder and louder in my heart. In our conversations, Ambrose and I are of the same heart in this, my responsibility being to offer him my views from my place of greater years of experience, while he contributes to me by reawakening in me the passionate and powerful feelings of youth, and his growing awareness that it is his generation that must mature to address the vast and huge issues facing mankind and challenging our species survival. To both of us it is clear the suffering is being driven by the uncaring greed and lust for monetary power. It is clear that upon this planet there is more than enough for all--- but that there is a rapidly growing gross inequity of distribution of resources. I am becoming of the opinion that until the basic quality of life needs of all beings are adequately met, that current laws which allow for the unlimited accumulation of obscene amounts of personal wealth must be revoked, that the ethic of equal opportunity and equal access to basic survival and betterment resources be made manifest. I am not against the right to accumulate a reasonable personal wealth per se…just the obscene levels of it, where one human can claim more resources than many millions of others combined. If you are not yet aware that this is our current reality, please educate yourself. It is. And there is no moral justification for this world to continue allowing such impoverishment of billions of our planetary citizens.
This is a very big dream, and it may be a distance away, but there are great rays of light arising. I personally find the candidacy (for US Congress) of Marianne Williamson inspiring, and I am contemplating how I might assist her to win a seat from which to speak sanity into the halls of government. I understand that true awakened consciousness must go there, that we might bring the Light of Love there too as quickly as possible.
In the meantime, I send each of you my heart's warm regards and greetings, encouraging you to continue meeting your life's challenges with good courage. I testify by these writing to my experience that always there are no accidents, and that the good blessings of this Universe are always available to be used as guidance along the Way.
Namaste, and Sat Nam,
David
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Rev. David Seacord
Fine Art Painter / Sufi Cherag
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